And so it begins

So for those not in the know, she left me about a month ago. She and my son live with another guy. I am moving back in with my parents at the end of the month. Moving back in with my parents will be a big challenge. I left their house 12 years ago vowing to never return. It's funny how life works out.

So the past month has been a roller coaster ride. Anger, depression, hope, peace, rage. A little bit of everything. I've spent the last month finishing school and recently packing for the big move. I say big move but I really only have a small room full of stuff to move. A lot of stuff is getting thrown away or given to her. I don't want things with memories to bring back emotions I'd rather forget. I never understood why my father had us move when he married my step mother, but now it all makes sense. He needed a fresh start. And that's what I'm doing. Starting over.

Over the last eight years, I have accumulated a lot of debt. Some from me just being young and dumb. Some from not having a partner who could help out with bills. Moving back in with the rents makes sense to get that under control.

I also don't know who I am anymore, besides a father. See, I compromised too much in my marriage. I let her break my spirit and just accept mediocrity. I need to found out who I am and what I stand for before I get back out there in the relationship world.

This soon-to-be divorce is bittersweet. It's nice to have my independence back. I have my bed back where I can spread out and not get woken up at night. But I've also become a "weekend dad." I can't know what's going on during the week over there. But, the time we spend together now is definitely time well spent.

This weekend I'm going to a music festival down in Kentucky called Krazyfest. It's a weekend full of hardcore & punk bands and pre and after parties. I'm going to try and put all of this on the back burner and enjoy myself. Because God knows I deserve it!